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And I can use html ?
alright, I'm going to use this page as a journal, maybe it will help me getting things done.
uf is unikodeforest (temp name) a game I'm making, its a multiplayer text based rpg, meant to be played in a terminal. When I try to close the server, it hangs in some configurations related to pending client request bloking some threads, in theory I know how to fix that, I just need to add one method and it should be good. I'm going to do the dishes then I'll get on fixing uf
music I listened to while doing the dishes: noda - soeur
alright uf is fixed (I hope) it was a slightly harder than expected
I slept most of the afternoon and I dont feel very energized
I have a page on my site that allow to browse through sprays (the images that players can put on wall in team fortress 2) I collect the sprays I encounter in my games and put them on display. These are not allways safe for work so I need to add a warning popup on the page before linking to it. The page needs work as well, I remember I was in the middle of refactoring it the last time I touched it
I cant sleep
I was listening to some musics earlier fête de l'acordéon et ils grattent sous ma porte that made me think of a book I used to have as an audio book when I was a kid. "Les lettres de mon moulin", its a bunch of short stories taking place in the south of france in the late 1800, told by a poet from Paris who bought a windmill in the south to find peace and inspiration. I have listned to it many times and even if it has probably been around ten years since I last heard a part of this book, I still remember most of the stories. (full text (in french))
Anyways, since I cant sleep, I started reading it again. In one of the stories, the narrator describe the time he used to spend on an island, "les sanguinaire". In a short description he explains spending a lot of time looking at the sea, and he describes the special mental state he gets in: "You dont think, you dont dream either. All your being slips away, you fly, you get scattered. You are the seagul who dives, the dust of sea foam floating in the sun between two waves, the white smoke of that ship going away [...] everything except yourself." I was very surprised to stumble on this, some form of out-of body/ego-death experience. The first time I had heard about similar things was in another (much more recent) book "le sumo qui ne pouvait pas grossir" (The Sumo wrestler Who Could Not Get Fat ) by Éric-Emmanuel Schmitt, in wich the hero meditates and describes feeling like hes body inflates, rips apart in a slow explosion and he becomes the world, anything over than himslef.
Even if Schmitt is from Belgium, his book takes place in Japan and he is also very fond of spirituality related topics, so in my head, I had the idea that this type of experience was only discussed in non-occidental spiritualities.(I never really thought about it, but I realise now its the impression I had). Seeing these very similar feelings described by Daudet a hundred years ago, in a book with many whimsical elements, but still very rooted in every day matters, really surprised and facinated me.
I aslo just learned when reading the wikipedia page of Daudet that he was extremely antisemitic.
Chilhood ruined, now these good stories have a bitter taste.
What a shit night
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